Regrets, I had a few...

Sometimes I forget I am only human! 


Sometimes I expect so much of myself and am left dumbstruck when I make a mistake. As if mistakes are only acceptable when others make them. 


Have you ever felt this way? Have you ever felt the weight of regret so heavy on your shoulders you wish you could just lie in bed and wait for this feeling to pass...in 100 years preferably! 


Feeling a little blue, I stumbled across the following quote:


"Do not brood over your past mistakes and failures as this will only fill your mind with grief, regret and depression. Do not repeat them in the future" 
Sivananda 


I couldn't control my feeling of anger towards this enlightened being who so simply put forth the command to "not repeat them in the future"! How dare he make it sound so easy?! 


Choosing to ruminate over the deplorable mistake kept me stuck in thoughts of self aversion. How could I have been so wrong? How could I have done something so bad? Judgement, judgement, judgement!


It took me a few days to realize that what would really help me get over dropping the ball, and moving on to simply "not repeating it in the future" is to evaluate how useful was it? 


How useful is  bringing into my life more of what I don't want? Like author Caroline Myss once said in a lecture, our life is like an investment. Who would keep investing in shares that don't bring them sufficiently high returns? If the return on investment in not high or satisfactory, one simply does not invest again. Simple as that! 


Humans make mistakes. It's part of being human! We are constantly on the road to growth and evolution, and there is usually little growth without pain and suffering. 


So next time you, like me, make a mistake, simply thank the heavens for the teaching and do not repeat it again. Like a wise investor, take it as a lesson, keep on investing else where and don't waste your precious time judging yourself. 


To our prosperity! 

We are all in this together!

I have come across an African word and concept that describes what I wish for the world today.

UBUNTU


Although Ubuntu has a much more profound and broad meaning, one interpretation that serves my purpose is:

"I am what I am because of who we all are." Leymah Gbowee

VIA Logical Geeks

As previously mentioned, I believe Ubuntu has a very profound meaning. Today, it resonated in my heart when listening to a new friend talk about her life. I tried in vain to hide my tears while listening to the sheer hardship she endured as a child and the extraordinary abundance that she created for herself ever since. 


Yet the magic lies in that she was willing to generously share her story and help me earnestly understand that if she has done it, I, or anyone for that matter, can do the same! Not once did I see a hint of regret or bitterness for what fate dropped in her arms as a little girl. On the contrary, I saw appreciation for hardship, I saw gratitude for life just as it is.  I admired as I felt her eagerness to share these feelings with others.


We talked about the power of our dreams, "Never be afraid of dreaming" She so wisely said "For your dreams will feed your soul and that will keep you moving". We talked about the power of our positive thoughts and how angels speak through those we interact with.


For a moment I wished with all my heart that everyone around me shared in this generosity of spirit. Like the Africans, we can learn to take part on others' happiness and prosperity and know that one's success does not mean his neighbor's failure. Quite the opposite.


Kindness generates kindness and love only spreads out to more love. 


We are all interconnected! 


"I am what I am because of who we all are!"

Empower the people to gain back our power!

Today, I want to ask you, who are reading this, to join me in my hope for a better future!  

As I was researching the internet after information on empowerment, I came across an all encompassing definition and point of view I want to share with all of those who, like myself, believe that only through individual change can any collective transformation occur.

Read on: 

"...we suggest that empowerment is a multi-dimensional social process that helps people gain control over their own lives. It is a process that fosters power (that is, the capacity to implement) in people, for use in their own lives, their communities, and in their society, by acting on issues that they define as important...

In addition, one important implication of this definition of empowerment is that the individual and community are fundamentally connected...

To create change we must change individually to enable us to become partners in solving the complex issues facing us. In collaborations based on mutual respect, diverse perspectives, and a developing vision, people work toward creative and realistic solutions."

VIA Journal of Extension

How important is your and your nation's future? Is it important enough as to create in you the fearlessness to work on your individual change process before you can collectively help free your country from heinously shameless corruption?

Please watch the video and you will understand why we are in such dire need of empowered, fearless individuals in our society!

People are tired of lies!

People are feeling cheated and manipulated!

Do you define your and your country's future as important? If so, join me in my hope to see an empowered community fearlessly stand up tall and implement their influence over corruption and mishandling of resources! Start acting by spreading this video!

I've got life!

Legendary singer and songwriter Nina Simone inspired me today!

Living in the heart of Athens, Greece, during this time of political chaos and social upheaval has proved to be both despairing and inspiring.

Needless to say, despair comes with realizing that millions of lives, hopes and dreams have been completely undermined and disdained, traded in for the force of greed, for the hunger of the few who need more and more to live in their version of peace! Despair is at the heart of moments like the ones of this past week, when hundreds of Greek citizens were hospitalized due to the brutal use of violence by the police force! Despair advances with seeing more and more educated and resourceful young men and women being laid off, not producing as their energy and fruitfulness allows them to, rather fleeing the country for a better tomorrow or giving up their dreams for a piece of bread!

Yet, at times like these, one cannot help but feel inspired! There is inspiration in the nation's biggest plateia (square), where hundreds of thousands have peacefully protested for over 25 days and nights, sharing their hope that tomorrow will be a better day and their dreams will not be derided. There is inspiration in knowing deep within, that from chaos, all great things are created! Inspiration also comes in returning to ourselves, looking within and painfully and bravely understanding that there is a reason why each and every one of us is involved in this massive muddle. Yet, the most pronounced inspiration is the remembrance that one doesn't need much to be happy or complete; because we have been given the greatest gift of all: our life!


Nina Simone inspired me today by reminding me to keep it simple and to be grateful for the generous present that is my life!

How much inspiration are you inviting into your own precious life?

If I were a rich man...

Today I was reminded of the unforgettably spectacular "Fiddler on the Roof" play, that tells the story of a Jewish family man who is going through his life dealing with changes. His daughters are growing and it's time to find them a husband, newcomers to the village are not welcome and amidst it all, Tevye, the main character, is dirt poor.

At one point, Tevye has a little conversation with God and here's how it goes:

This delightful video depicts Reb Tevye sharing his wish to be a wealthy man. We all have wishes. Some are as big as becoming wealthy while others are not as big, like wanting a new pair of sunglasses or a computer.

So how can we make our wishes come true? Reb Tevye chose to have a talk with the Big Man up there. If he will be heard or not is a different story, but I will share some tips on how to turn your wishes into reality.

The first step to attaining your wish is to stop seeing it as merely a wish and make it into your goal. What is the difference, one might ask, between a wish and a goal? Well, the difference is in the structure. A wish is like a dream, something that is nice to imagine but not much energy is put into actually attaining it. Do you still wish upon a star? Well, if you do, I'm going to have to be the one who will awaken you to the bitter fact that the star will do nothing to help your wish come true! Sorry if I burst your bubble! Life is cruel, I know!

Start acting by writing your goal down. Writing our goals down is the first step to making them achievable. It also gives us the opportunity to go back to them when we start drifting away! State your goal in the positive, as the brain does not make a distinction between positive and negative. For example, if you want to stop smoking, your written statement will not be "I will stop smoking". The brain will focus on "smoking" and that will make it all the more difficult to quit. A good way to write it down would be "I am smoke free" or "I am healthy". Notice too, I have written "I am..." instead of "I want to...". Expressing your goal in the present engages your brain in believing it is in that state.

Make your goal as specific as possible. Include details of how you want the goal to look like, smell, feel, etc. What exact outcome are you looking for or what is it exactly that you want to accomplish?

Also, make sure your goal is measurable. How will you know when you have achieved that goal if you are not able to quantify it, or to determine some sort of evidence that shows you have reached it?

Furthermore, take time to think if your goal is attainable. Is attaining that goal within your possibilities and does it only depend on you? I like to tell the story of how I once wanted to have "Madonna arms". I was living in the land of frustration, because obviously having "Madonna arms" was not within my possibilities as I did not have the time to work out so much nor did I have the right person next to me to guide me through it (a personal trainer for example). That kept me frozen, as I felt frustrated from the very beginning.

VIA Daily Mail

Make sure your goal is time bound. In other words, set a specific date for reaching that goal! That gives you a clear idea of when to start and a way to check your progress. Also, without a deadline, you think about the goal as something you will accomplish, someday, eventually, and that is not challenging enough for our task seeking brains.

Finally, HAVE FUN WITH IT! A goal doesn't have to be something heavy looming on the back of your head! Find ways to play with it. Just like Reb Tevye, sing about it out loud! Make up a tune and sing it in the car or in the shower! Make a drawing of yourself having achieved that goal! What will you look like? What will your environment look like? Add in lots of colors, make it radiant!

I am certain that Reb Tevye would achieve his goal of becoming a rich man if he had some extra tips on goal setting. He was definitely on the right track! He could already envision himself and what he would do if he were a rich man!

What about you? What will you do or look like after you have achieved your next goal?

Afraid of the dark? Think again!

"It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us"
Marianne Williamson, "A Return to Love"

As a psychotherapist and life coach, I have encountered and worked with many individuals who very much fear what we often call "our inner darkness". Those characteristics, traits, behaviors that are often accompanied by terror when they choose to surface! We all have them, let's not kid ourselves! Those parts of ourselves that we don't know how to deal with or relate to. Understandably, this inability to handle these facets of our personality might lead us to dreading them.

What Marianne Williamson so insightfully shares with and invites us to understand is that above that fear of our inner darkness towers our fear of the light within!

VIA redbubble

This fear of our inner light is something we rarely pay attention to or even identify. Ironically, it is the sole roadblock stopping us from becoming the best version of ourselves! What is it that you REALLY want? What person do you most want to be? If you can close your eyes and envision your ideal self, how would it be? How would you be living?

Now close your eyes again and think of it actually happening! Think of yourself as being your ideal self, living the way you most want to live. What sensations do you feel in your body when you try this? Is your heart beating faster or did you get a lump in your stomach?

You will find that it is very scary to think of having all that you want, being all that you want or helping others as much as you want! Thoughts like: "I don't deserve it", "how can I have it while others can't" or "others will realize I am not that good" often cross our minds. Hence, our enormous fear of the light within!

Know that all that's stopping you from being the best you that you can ever be is merely your own fear. The good news is that if you consciously understand this and try to come in contact with this fear, one baby step at a time, you will see that getting in touch with the light within - that constant source of creativity, positivity and courage we all possess - is not only feasible but also fun! The fun lies in discovering yourself and pushing yourself and then discovering a bit more about yourself only to push yourself a bit further and discover another facet of yourself that will soon push you to want to discover a little more!

Discover and push forward! You will soon find you have impressively left that fear behind! You too can come in touch with that inner light and bring it out so it can lead the way to whatever it is you most want to shine it on.

Tip of the day!

OK, so being on top of it all is not always easy!
I haven't been able to write much this past month, so I decided to post a quote that I found inspiring and worth sharing!

"Not a single person is born in the world who has not a certain capacity which will make him proud, who is not pregnant with something to produce, to give birth to something new and beautiful, to make the existence richer. There is not a single person who has come into the world empty." Osho

Can you take a few minutes to think about one or two things that make you feel proud of yourself? What makes you think you have to wait for others to acknowledge your capacities?  Can you pat yourself on the back and congratulate yourself for them?  (I mean literally pat yourself on the back! Or kiss your shoulder, or blow yourself a kiss in front of the mirror! Who cares what you do, no one is watching!!)

You come to this world alone and you leave it alone still! Why not live in it feeding yourself with your own acknowledgment and admiration - you alone have the capacity to applaud yourself the most! Are you consciously and consistently doing that?