Because you are better than that!

Have you ever caught yourself blaming that person who you trusted and let you down? 

Pointing all the injustice that he/she has committed, all the ways they've hurt you, all that they could have done and decided not to or the other way around? 

I'm sure you have, it happens to everyone at one point or another. That friend who betrayed your life long friendship, that boss that blamed you for his own incompetencies or that person who broke your trust and let you down when you really needed her. 

When anger and blame creep up, it can consume our mind and our heart and can stay there forever. 

The Dalai Lama says a good way to be freed from this poisonous feeling is to make a distinction between the action and the actor.

You can be angry at the action and still have compassion for the actor. Understand that the person is coming from the only place he/she know.  

Regardless, know that placing blame and pointing fingers only keeps you stuck in a cycle of negativity that leads you nowhere. Life is about being hit and standing up again, stronger, tougher and wiser. 

Take time to watch the short video below and be inspired!

Believe you CAN!

Believe you can, believe you can, believe you can!

I know you might be thinking this sounds like positive psycho-blabber and I will share with you my view on why it is actually more important than you think.

I want you to think about a time when you were being interviewed for a job you really wanted.
What would your behavior be if you thought:
"There is no chance I will get the job, others are so much better and I barely have any experience"
Now think, would you act in a different way, if your thoughts were:
"Yeah, I'm going to nail this interview because I'm amazing!"

We set ourselves up and live our life according to the quality of our thoughts.
When we are little, our thoughts are mostly an extension of the world around us. How our parents react towards us, what our teachers and friends say to and about us become our guide. Without realizing it, neuro pathways or connections are formed and the more we believe our thoughts (consciously or unconsciously), the stronger the connection becomes.

VIA bookbing.org

Our thoughts have the power to change our physical reactions, thus leading us to live our lives in this or that way, take this or that action. Try it right now! Think about yourself picking up a big, juicy, yellow lemon. With your mind's eye, smell it, notice its color, feel its bumpy texture. Now cut it open with a knife, see the liquid running and stick your teeth deep inside the yellow lemon, tasting its acidity. What happens in your mouth? And you didn't even actually taste the darn thing!!

To quote Henry Ford: "Whether you think you can or you think you can't - you are right"
Whatever it is your heart desires, a new job, the promotion, driving your company to success or healing some aspect of your life, you have to BELIEVE YOU CAN!
Even if at first it seems fake. When you start hearing those fearful voices inside your head, just repeat to yourself: "I can do it! I can do it! I CAN do it!"
You are training your brain and making the neurological pathways - with the information that you can! - stronger.  
As they say, where there's a will, there's a way!
You just have to believe you can find that way and remember to pat yourself on the back when you discover that you really could do it!

Don't wish it was easier, wish you were tougher!

The title is a quote by Jim Rohn, an author and motivational speaker known for being the mentor of Tony Robbins, Brian Tracy and T. Harv Eckar, all very accomplished authors in the self development industry.

The quote struck me as I am going through a stressful period. Those who have accompanied my writing  might have noticed that I haven't written in a good long time. Writer's block is what some call it. Others call it drying up. I certainly felt blocked and dried out of ideas!
I felt panic. Is it going to last forever? Am I never going to be able to write again? Will I ever finish the book I am writing? Then I would enter a high voltage zone of self torture and think of all the things I SHOULD be doing to circumvent this horrific dry-block!

Nothing worked. Days went by and the dryness culminated to a drought. This drought in writing reflected the way I felt inside.

VIA Freaque Waves

Today I had an a-ha moment (this a-ha moment is such a cliche, yet it does explain it pretty simply) and realized that I was stuck in a dry block out of shear fear. I am going through a challenging period in my life, having to make life changing decisions while living in a debt and crisis ridden country, where nothing other than how poor everyone is becoming is talked about, anywhere!

It is a stressful period, I resignedly admit. I tried my best to hide (from myself and others) the fact that I was feeling stressed, overwhelmed and most of all scared.

Today after reading Rohn's quote, I understood that I was secretly wishing it would be easier. I was secretly waiting for the universe to send me a buoy that would guarantee everything would turn out the way I wish it would. And I was feeling scared.

No wonder I had a block, I was frozen with fear.
Fear usually does this - either makes you move forth in a rage or freeze up like a fruit popsicle.

Frozen and scared thoughts - frozen and scared feelings - frozen and scared action (or rather, inaction)!

Today I was liberated when I realized it's only my focus that's at fault. Focusing on external circumstances, wishing and praying they would be more favorable. Focusing on measuring how big my problems are and how deep the dryness. Wishing it was all much easier.

Today I decided I will focus on me!
Am I focusing on thinking positive, happy and self loving thoughts? Even after the scary ones come along?
Am I focusing on taking planned action, keep on walking, regardless of fear? After all, isn't this world made of daily opportunities?
Am I focusing on my heart's goal, despite the hardships that make it look so far away at the present moment?

Today, I remembered that I have reached my fullest potential when I had positive thoughts that led me to have positive feelings that led me to take positive action!

If I can dispense one message while emerging from a cold (and dry) and obstructed place, it would be:  Constantly focus on you - your thoughts, feelings and actions!
From wishful thinking to toughness in the most powerful way!