Keep the faith!

I came across a very interesting picture the other day and wanted to share it with my esteemed readers. (credits to facebook!)

It is not my intention to turn this into a scientific or philosophical conversation, yet I do wish to express some of my own thoughts on faith. 

I often talk to people who tell me they have no faith in God (or whatever you want to call it) because He has never been proven. No one really knows  the truth about it and some have even "proved" that there could be no such thing. 

In my opinion, having faith (in something bigger and outside of ourselves) is not about proving if there is or not something out there. 

Having faith is about constantly and blindingly feeding myself with the thought that the creative force that made the infinite space around us, the burning sun, the scented flowers and my toenails, is always available to me. 

It is about indiscriminately believing that this creative energy is within me and you as it is without. 

My faith does not lead me to believe in this or that God, it leads me to believe that everyday of my life I can choose to be this or that person. 

My faith allows me to align my brain in accordance to all the beauty that surrounds me. 

Yes, there are ugly sights to be seen and hardships to be faced, yet my faith helps me believe that even without seeing them at this moment, brighter days will surely arrive. 

My faith allows me to keep positive and positivity is the only road to keeping open for whatever I want to come my way. 

Having faith in God, in the Universe, in the Stars, in my eternal Spirit, allows me to remember that I am at the same time insignificant and colossal. Just like our vast earth is one more spec in the sky, I too can be anything and still everything can come my way! 

Therefore, keep it real and keep the faith, brother!

Own your life, you are not a victim!

Do you often find yourself caught in drama, amidst stories, gossip, judgments, conflicting situations? Are you known to your friends as the “Queen or King of Drama”. I was the queen of drama for a long time! LONG, LONG time! Every job I had, I was caught in some sort of trivial dispute.  Something had to be the matter, everywhere I went.  Some friends called me “El Niño”, I now see why!

Once, I wanted to act as a volunteer in a big NGO and even as a volunteer there was drama. The vice president decided she didn’t want me to volunteer anymore. Not content with that, she called all top team players (including the NGO’s president!) and I was caught in the middle of a finger pointing session, which boiled down to – what she described as – me being too thirsty to reaching for the water pot! Oh how I was caught in the “poor me” frame of mind then! “Poor me, all I wanted to do was volunteer my time and energy to help others and look what happens! This always happens to me”! 

Showing up in the world from a victim’s position is extremely common and at the same time so hard to detect. Therefore, we can remain victims for years and some remain victims their whole lives.

A victim always believes things “happen to him”. A victim blames others for everything that happens. It’s the “It’s not my fault that…” way of thinking.

Here’s the thing, thinking about fault is absolutely useless. Nothing is anybody’s fault, things happen to us because we have to learn. We are here in this world to constantly grow, evolve and change and this is the only certain thing in life. Rather we choose to think about it or not, accept it or not, we are always growing and changing (are you the same as you were 15 years ago?). Those who understand and make the best of this are never caught in a victim position, they are owners of their lives and their circumstances.

A victim will always try to find someone or something to blame for what happens to him. In contrast, an owner will look at the situation and try to find:

1) What was his responsibility in the situation – not to blame himself but to understand what he is doing to be caught in it.

2) What lesson can he learn form what happened? What is the most important thing he can get from this story?

3) What can he DO NEXT – what can he change in himself, in his environment, in his choices -  which will free him from being caught in similar situations.

In my above example with the "NGO witch who was after me" (!!), it took me years to look back on it and be able to understand how I was responsible. I learned that the way I plunge into projects with all my energy and soul, might seem threatening to others. Therefore, I now try to keep my cool, especially with those who haven't worked with me before. This makes relationships less threatening and in turn, much more efficient.

When we start seeing ourselves as agents/owners of our own circumstances we understand that we have choices and that everything that happens to us is an opportunity for growth and learning. One who is always aware of how he can use circumstances in his favor will never be caught in a victim frame of mind, simply because he is too busy powerfully restructuring himself and his circumstances in order to get different results next time.

Instead of blaming others, the economy, the universe, your karma - choose to live your life powerfully! Extract the lessons from everything that comes your way and adapt according to that knowledge! 

Use your body to create powerful connections

How do you know the people you are connecting to are the best fit for you? Who are you surrounding yourself with?
There is a saying that goes: "Show me your friends and I will tell you who you are".
That is equally true for your personal friendships as for your professional partnerships.

One thing that most entrepreneurs have difficulty with is building a powerful team that share in their values and their company's mission and vision.
One of the reasons for this is because as the creators, entrepreneurs often get caught up in wanting to maintain control of all aspects of the company.  This leads them to forget that, like all other human beings, they are good at some things and not so good at others.  No one can be great at everything. (Unless of course you have a Greek mom, who is truly convinced you are God's gift to the world and will happily share how perfect you are with anyone she exchanges a few words with!!)

Another difficulty in creating strong partnerships is that all too often people tend to forget to pay attention to how they really feel about the people around them.
Like personal friendships, our professional team has to be made up of people we can openly talk to, feel comfortable discussing ideas with and who share similar values as us.
It's all too great partnering up with that Ivy League graduate who speaks eloquently, yet do you feel there is a free flow of ideas? Do you feel that your objectives are similar and you can discuss your projects comfortably? Are his values compatible to yours?

We have a natural and extremely potent tool for detecting if the person in front of us is a good fit.  This tool is called: OUR BODY! One way to find out if the people surrounding you are a good match, is to check with your body.

What sensations do you feel when you are in a meeting with your team or your partners? A great exercise is to notice how you feel when you are speaking to each person. Really pay attention to your bodily reactions.
There are certain people we speak to and end the conversation always feeling tired or sleepy (that feeling of being drained). With others, we might feel our heart racing faster, some excitement in our chest. Still, with someone else, we might experience that "gut feeling" that tells us to say this or that.
Listen to it! Respect it!

Our bodies have energy centers (the so called chakras), wheel-like vortices that receive and transmit energy and information from and to the universe around them.  In a more subtle level, our bodies are always tuned and closely connected to the world around us. We have to teach ourselves and practice, practice, practice paying attention to our bodily sensations because our body's energy field can pick up valuable information we are not able to pick up with words.

Next time you are speaking to a potential partner, to someone who wants to enter your team or who already is a part of your team, take time to consciously pay attention to your bodily sensations. Are the feelings in your body positive or negative? What would they tell you if they could speak? What shape would they take if you could see them? Can you attribute a color to this specific sensation?

Pay attention to your body! It knows and is constantly communicating to you who is the right person to connect to in any given situation. 

On sticking to your decisions

Have you ever made a decision not to do something and find yourself doing it anyway? The compelling force of that which gives us pleasure (even if followed by pain) is such that one can never be prepared enough to withstand his weak spots.

"Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak." Bible, Matthew 26:41

I recently went back on a decision I had made and found myself getting angry at myself, being judgmental and having generalized thoughts such as "I can never stick to my decisions! I will never be able to say no to this!"


Maybe you decided not to eat chocolate in the next month or not to go into facebook when you need to get work done. Maybe it's a decision not to drink more than a preset number of wine glasses per night or not to kiss that person who has absolutely nothing to offer you emotionally.

No matter what decision we make, it takes more than wishful thinking or a positive attitude to stick to it!
It is well known that people are motivated either to get away from pain or to move towards pleasure. Going back on a decision can represent either of the two above. Either you are seeking to avoid pain: "I'm going to DIE if I don't eat that chocolate mousse" or to find pleasure: "That man's kisses give me goose bumps". Sometimes, it can represent both: "I get nervous in social situations. If I drink a whole pool of wine, the night will go by like a breeze".

Here's the first and most important step to dealing with not sticking to your decisions:
FORGIVE YOURSELF!

This sounds like something easy and straightforward and I guarantee that most of you have had a difficult time forgiving yourself after going back on a decision.
Forgiving ourselves is important because it is the purest form of compassion towards ourselves. Compassion for nothing less than being human! Hey, our brains are wired to seek pleasure!

I had this conversation with a client today who told me he felt that if he forgave himself, he would be complying with falling into temptation.
Yes and no!
Yes, if we make a habit out of finding excuses for why we fall into temptation, then forgiving ourselves might be just a way of excusing our behavior.
No, because if there is no true forgiveness, there is no true healing.

The second step to dealing with temptation is to identify what is going on in your body. How does your body feel when faced with the temptation? Do you feel butterflies in your stomach, does your chest weigh a little heavier, does your heart beat faster in anticipation? How does your body react? What would that reaction tell you if it could talk to you?

The third step to dealing with temptations is to always remember it takes nothing less than a warrior to stand tall in the face of seduction. To be a warrior requires you to think in terms of what you will accomplish versus concentrating on what you are trying to "resist".  How will sticking to your decision make your life more fulfilling? How will it help you grow? How will it help you be free and liberated? Can you feel how powerful you are when you stick to your decisions?

Forgive yourself and keep on moving. Keep on moving with the power of the warrior who is certain he will accomplish great things if he only has the courage to pay attention to himself and believe with all his might that tomorrow will be a better day.

On the importance of closing cycles

Are you aware of the cycles you open in life?
Are you aware of the words you speak?
Do your words start partnerships, projects or promises that remain in that state - no change in status, not moving forwards, or backwards let alone to any side?
Do you finish what you start?

Beware!
You might not realize it but living amongst open cycles is actually keeping you in a powerless position. Why?
Because you, my friend, are losing precious energy!
When you start something (be it with your word or actions) you are bound to that in an energetic level. You have invested your valuable energy - in the form of thoughts, words and/or actions (all of which require physical energy to come about) and what has become of it? What has been the return on your investment?

If it's working, find out what's working, invest more energy, value it, elaborate, perfect it.
If it's not working, make a bold decision as to what is to be done with it - and take the next step!

Don't pretend it's not happening or make believe that not taking a stance is the most natural thing to do. Leaving things hanging entails confusion and lack of clarity. That is the energy that you are sending out into the universe. Confused and unclear thought-energy.  Guess what you're going to get back from the universe?

The beauty in closing cycles is that you collect back your energy and are free to focus and pour it anywhere else you desire. Powerfully and clearly!

Clear and focused thoughts, clear and focused action.

Open Cycle!
If it's working:
Great!
Move ahead!
If it isn't working:
Great!
Close Cycle!
Move ahead!

A quote to remember

I gave a workshop this week and the title was "How to keep your power through difficult times". It was a great experience because apart from the fact that a couple of people who had never opened up to some hidden aspects of themselves, did so and did so publicly (sharing yourself in front of others is VERY powerful), something very curious happened.

One participant waited for everyone to leave so he could tell us (myself and my colleague who was presenting the workshop with me) that he felt extremely annoyed about what one person said and it was our responsibility to have stopped that person from speaking.

I asked him: "What stopped you from speaking up and sharing your thoughts about it in the group instead of waiting for everyone to leave?"

I will not get into the details about where that conversation led, yet the importance of what I am sharing is that OUR THOUGHTS have the power to stop us dead in our tracks or to help us fly higher than we ever imagined possible.

Have you ever stopped to think about the quality of your thoughts?
How is your precious energy (in the form of thought) being spent most of the days?
Do you have any control over them? Do they know who is BOSS? By the way, who is boss, you or your thoughts?

If you are willing to slow down from the hustle and bustle of life and sit quietly for a short while, you will realize the vast amount of thoughts that cross your mind at any given moment. They keep coming, all the time, all random thoughts. The bad news is they are mostly negative (it is our human nature to have negative, fearful, worrisome, doubtful thoughts) the good news is that one can practice and through practice, perfectly go beyond his thoughts. Like any other thing to be mastered, it takes practice to control and focus your mind, yet it is no doubt the biggest gift you will ever give yourself! Much better than attaining a gym membership for one year,  much cheaper than joining a yoga studio and oh so much more powerful than listening to anyone's motivational speech.

I can't stress enough the importance of the book by James Allen, "As a Man Thinketh" published in 1902. This is a gem of a book and every page is important.

James Allen talks about the power our thoughts exert upon us and focuses the reader's attention on the quality of her own thoughts. Allen goes on to talk about how important it is to have a purpose in life. A purpose that will have you longing to get somewhere, do something, be someone and through that keep your thoughts focused and far away from fears, worries, doubts and judgements.

Today, a few lines from the book stood out for me and I will share them with you.

"As the physically weak man can make himself strong by careful and patient training, so the man of weak thoughts can make them strong by exercising himself in right thinking.
To put away aimlessness and weakness, and to begin to think with purpose, is to enter the ranks of those strong ones who only recognize failure as one of the pathways to attainment; who make all conditions serve them, and who think strongly, attempt fearlessly, and accomplish masterfully."

Practice noticing your thoughts. Practice focusing your thoughts. Practice makes perfect! If you encounter failure along the way, think nothing of it. Thank your lucky stars for the learning opportunity and carry on practicing!

Inspiration, inspiration wherefore art thou?

I hear people talk about not having inspiration. Not being inspired to do their best in their job, not being inspired to start or continue writing (I've been through "a few" of those days myself), not being inspired to paint the next canvas, not being inspired enough to help change the world.
We've all been through it in one way or another. Feeling a lack of inspiration, as if inspiration were something that comes from the outside and will fall upon our heads if we procrastinate long enough and do our best to pretend we aren't worried about it.


The secret to becoming inspired in order to create (anything) is to always be creating. Creating at all times, even if it doesn't look like inspired creation. Creating in the form of taking action. Taking action even when you hear the inner voices saying nothing great will come out of it or reminding you of all those negative self beliefs you have collected and come to believe throughout your life.
Taking action frees us from being stuck in our negative thoughts and allows the body to express itself as it so desires.

If it is writing, sit down to write at a certain time everyday, or choose 5, 4, 2x a week and do it when the day and time come. Even if you have nothing to write, write about it. Write about not having anything to write, write about the table you are using to write. Write about the floor or any patterns you see outside your window.

If it is selling, call your next potential client. If it is painting, put up the canvas and start scribbling, if it's creating a movement, share your influential idea with one next person.

As Steve Chandler, personal success coach and author, puts it, creativity is about the body, not the mind. It has to do with the actions you take. After taking action, the mind follows with new ideas, in the form of inspiration that you will then act on.

To illustrate my point, I share a contemporary urban story.


I have the pleasure of knowing a very talented young musician, Katerina Polemi, who like myself, is an anglo saxon educated, Greek-Brazilian girl that now lives in this crises ridden yet breathtakingly gorgeous country - Greece.

In one of her shows I attended, Katerina shared with her audience how one day she was having some difficulty feeling inspired to write a song. What makes this such an impactful example is that Katerina took steps to create without being inspired. She took action and started playing around, writing a few verses, talking to inspiration itself. She didn't wait for inspiration to shine down upon her like a ray of light. She took action, got herself inspired and created an incredible song.

Watch below, what amazing melody came out of this mental doodle.