F*@&* THE POLICE!

Some months ago, I was driving in my car after a long day at work, when a motorcycle came zooming in front of me from a small side street, completely disregarding the HUGE RED STOP sign signaling nothing else than to literally stop instead of just cutting in front of my car that way! 

                                                         


Of course, this is a common phenomenon here in Greece and under other circumstances I would just get angry, maybe curse the blessed soul and move on with my life (obviously vibrating in a much lower level)! The thing is it just so happened that it was a police motorcycle, one of the many I've seen doing similar acts over the past year I have returned to this breathtakingly beautiful country. 


I decided right then and there that I wasn't taking any more of this "do as I say not as I do" attitude very common to some (of course not all) policemen. So I drove close to the motorcycle and politely asked if he hadn't seen the STOP sign, or my car coming, for that matter. He couldn't believe I had the audacity to ask such a question and automatically commanded me to pull over. I did as the authority ordered! He took his time to get off his bike and had a quick chat with the policewoman that accompanied  him. He definitely wasn't in a rush and obviously couldn't care less if I happened to be.




So he came next to my window and in a very intimidating tone, asked me to repeat my question. I did as I was told adding that I was frustrated at seeing so many police cars and motorcycles without the use of sirens, disregarding STOP signs and red lights, putting my, and their own lives in danger. I asked "aren't you supposed to be law abiding citizens". "No", he answered, "we are not common citizens like you and we do not have to do as you do". Fair enough, but still I wanted to make sure I understood what he meant correctly: "So you are telling me that you do not have to respect safety directives such as red lights and STOP signs?" He was a little taken aback by my insistence in wanting to know such things, and after some thought answered: "Yes we do" (Great, I thought, at least we are at the same level on this one!) "But", he continued "often times we have urgent situations to attend to, like I have now, which was why I ran the STOP sign, and your questions are impeding me from being where I am supposed to be". Of course I could go on telling him that if he really had to be somewhere urgently enough as to HAVE to run a STOP sign, he wouldn't have pulled me over in the first place. I decided to let that one 
go and just thanked him for doing his job of protecting us citizens, so well!



That is when I determined that, although I appreciate policemen, who are mostly underpaid and risk their lives to protect me, I was going to be MY OWN AUTHORITY from now on.  



But how does one go about being his/her own authority? This is one that takes time and needs much honest self reflection! 


First, you have to identify what are the things that really work for you? More specifically, what are your true needs?
Anthony Robbins, the great and inspiring motivational speaker, says there are 6 basic human needs:
1) Need for Certainty (to avoid pain and to survive)
2) Need for Uncertainty (that comes in the form of variety)
3) Need for Significance (feeling important)
4) Need for Connection and Love (connecting to people is often easier than really loving)
And the final two are our soul needs
5) Need for Growth 
6) Need to Contribute (go beyond "me") 
Which needs would you say you value most? If you were to choose two, which two would they be?


Then, you must come to terms with your deepest desires. These desires can be of the flesh or have a spiritual or mental dimension to them. Being disconnected from or trying to negate your true desires disempowers you and does not allow you to fully flourish and become your own authority. 


Next, take a good look at those things that concern you most. Where are your thoughts most of the time? What are the matters and issues that grab your attention? What do you think of most during your day? Getting in touch with what concerns you allows you to get a grip on your ever so noisy and over stimulated mind and helps you identify if these thoughts are limiting or allow for liberation and expansion. 



Finally, what are your habits? When you start looking in to your habits you will see what really drives you, as these are the the actions/thoughts that you do most and that have become ingrained in you, sometimes giving you the false impression that you "are" these habits.


When you really start looking at these elements of your self in this way, you will realize a great deal about your true essence. The mere act of stopping to think about them, is a huge step forward to becoming your own authority and not allowing just anyone to impose his ideas upon you.  The prerequisite for becoming your own authority is to know yourself very well and be willing to look at the positive and negative aspects that could help or hinder you towards achieving this goal. Acceptance or rejection of these aspects will follow naturally.

You think this "to do" list is too long? Got tired just reading it? You think you "instinctively" know all this about yourself that you don't need to spend any time searching deep within you for these answers? No problem my friend, no problem at all! Just make sure you are thankful to all those cops out there and continue on swiftly down the lane. Just remember to look both ways and speed down a bit, especially when encountering a STOP sign along another person's way! 

Messages From a Beautiful Girl

I was once told that if there is someone you love and a beautiful woman takes this someone away from you, she is trying to tell you something. It is important to see what she is trying to tell you as it is surely an essential message. I didn't fully agree with the lesson, but decided to keep my heart open to it nonetheless. Until it happened to me!

I am in the fortunate yet in all honesty, distressing position of trying to decipher the message! The same beautiful woman has taken not one, but two men away from me! Two of the last men who have drifted through my life were later somehow involved with the same beautiful woman. In this case, it is the same beautiful girl, but allow me to keep talking about a woman, as it surely has a more dramatic feel to it!

                                                      Image by Gerge Petty

Of course, analyzing the story from a place of less self pity, one of them she never really took away and the other was never really mine to take away, but still, it is a colossal coincidence, to say the very least!

Of all beautiful women in this world, how come it is the same one involved?

So now I finally decided to accept what they had once told me, and am trying hard to understand what it is this girl is unknowingly attempting to tell me.

Could it be that she is showing me that the men I go for are actually interested in going after young girls?  Is this the pattern I have chosen to reinforce my sense of selflessness and more specifically, my perish-fulness? I could put myself in a victim position and start going on and on about what this one did and what that one did, but the real issue here is me. If one is to empower and respect him/herself, one has to come to terms with the realization that all the choices he makes stem from what he values and what images he has of himself in relation to the rest of the world. So the secret is to always focus on the "I", not on the other.

                                                  

With the danger of coming across as a love doctor and the full awareness that relationships are more complex than we can possibly analyze in a few words, I ask all women out there:

Have you thought about which of your values you are honoring by being with or going after this particular man you are interested in? Have you thought about what familiar patterns he represents? Most importantly, if this is a relationship where you feel you are not fully respected, appreciated or "seen", have you pondered about what values you are willing to sacrifice just to say that you have a handsome man by your side? Sometimes, let's be honest, he isn't even that handsome!! By the way, this holds just as true for all men out there!

So my question today is: how willing are you to really look at your relationships or the people that interest you and identify the messages they present you with?  My message came in the form of a beautiful girl, how has it come for you?

Just to finish off with a message, here goes a spicy one:

"The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think".  Author Unknown